1.    Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

2.    When they ask for your phone # give them theirs and see if they notice.

3.    Tell them to put the crust on top this time.

4.    Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.

5.    Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.

6.    Say "Are you sure this is (Pizza Place)? When they say yes, say "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" See how they respond.

7.    Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.

8.    Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."

9.    Put them on hold.

10.    Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.